Saturday, March 26, 2011

Je suis inquiet

As of 3:30pm today, my closet and dresser hold exactly half the clothes they used to, my massive stack of important papers has been sorted and stored, and a snowboard I didn't own yesterday is leaning against my wall. Not bad for one day. And my new camera battery finally came, so prepare for a ton of photo posts in the coming weeks. :3

I'm finding that the fewer things I own, the more comfortable I am. Sounds a little backwards, I know, but honestly one of the weirdest days of my life was when I realized I couldn't fit everything I owned into my car anymore. As nice as it is to have my own bed, dresser, desk, and other pieces of furniture, I'm finding that I don't particularly like owning them. And nothing, nothing feels better than tossing out old stuff in preparation for new and exciting people and places in the near future.

I'm not one to hang onto much from my past. Some people scrapbook, some people just shove everything into boxes and periodically go through them. I toss almost everything. I rarely go through the stuff from my past, and usually when I do, it turns out to be more emotionally stressful than pleasantly nostalgic. Not that I've had a bad life at all. I've had it pretty great so far! I just don't particularly enjoy reminiscing about the person I used to be. I tend to keep the really important memories and people from my past in my present (and hopefully in my future). I don't need or want to go through old diaries to dredge up things I left in the past - they were left behind for a reason.

I've been talking for a long time about leaving Seattle, and I think it might be time to finally do so. I'm about to sign a six month lease to live downtown, and while I'm definitely excited to spend the summer and early autumn living in one of my favorite places, it feels less like the fulfillment of a long-held goal and more like an appropriate farewell to a city that I love but need to leave as soon as possible.

There's a time for settling down and seeking out a comfortable constancy in life, but I'm too young for that shit.

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